Last night, I lost 4 friends

I can't sleep. I have no friends.by choice. And that is why I can't sleep. One person hates me because he thinks I touched his shit. So I blocked his number. One person is a stoner and has nothing to do with my problems. guilty by affiliation.  So I blocked his number. One person, I love. enough said. I blocked her number. One person, I love, but I could never tell him that... Instead, like usual, I made him think that I am the worst person on the fucking planet. I blocked his number. 4 people, 1 night, end of many things. I have been waiting for this. If you want to be my friend, there are some things you should know... I don't know how to be nice. I like problems. And I probably hate you. But I will love you, if I have only met you once.

In regards to the fantastic 4, it was good, but not great.

my lungs

easter. that's American for boring.

 last night i found out that some people are nice and some people are not. i thought that i had a friend, or two. and then, i found out that i don't. men and woman are different, this much is true. however. we are all humans. we all have emotions. why is it so hard to play both roles.... human and friend. human and human.


 so i think that the best thing i can do is quit my semi friends. people like, ummm... people. i think my lungs might work more efficiently if i just take in oxygen on my own time.

cry cry kry stine

fuck. why do i love the things that i can't have. i actually care about someone... SURPRISE. no one else cares. he does not care about you.

i'm tired and i'm pissed.

dear jesus.
i hate easter.
sincerely, god.

I don't know how this happened,(in fact, my mother fuckin' mother drove me here((I do love her!))) but I am sitting in the back room of a dark house. I know what house it is, I know what is going on, I know my cat, he is in my arms, but there is a larger question here... When did the lights get turned off? Have I been so deprived from a liquid crystal screen for so long that I have" that night IS actually dark?

Whatever the case, it is better out here. Out here in the dark pin hole sky. Some one once told me that if I could grab a star, I would have the blood of a god. What I misheard is that I would probably have the dirty blood of a dog. I made that up. Don't fuck animals, that goes for whores.

so i just realized that i have not been puking my thoughts out (blogging) in a long time. sooooo, obviously, i need to catch up.
i actually don't think i should do that.
i was about to write what i really felt... okay.
i will.