i was at the gynaecologist today for a few hours. i spent about 45 minutes of those few hours in a cold, naked, confused state. no one was around. i was all alone. just hanging out, in a huge napkin, sitting on a little doggy pee pad on top of a cold plastic table. good think i had Steinbeck's the pearl to read. which just made me sort of sad and even more confused.
i got a shot today and when i really started to analyze the consequences of it, i started to cry. i sat on the couch and told my roommate, whom i have only known for one year, that i was worried about dieing of cancer in the next 20 years because i got this shot. and its not just one shot, it will be, eventually, 3 shots. so i started to let my eyes well up. he told me to chill. he is sort of a doctor, after all. but... FUCK. what is this? what is this serum in my body? it's supposed to help me be more of a slut and less of a reasonable, worried, fucking crazy lame adult. learn more about how science is dieing to save me.
i went to the dentist today. she told me that my tooth pain is probably because i clench my jaw. i told her that i did not. as i sit here and type, i realize i clench my jaw. like, really, really bad.
so i sat around naked in a public office, got injected with drugs that make me worry for my unknown future, was told of how i live my life, and to top it off, the brussels sprouts that i picked in the brussels-sprout-cook-off did not win, even though they should have.
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