someone... end this for me.

i'm about to end my 24th year on this planet in a similar way in which i started my 24th year on this planet... completely wrong.

my mom told me that i need to stop making my birthday such a paradoxical time and that i get way to worked up over this shit. she said something like "god, i fucking dreaded your birthdays when you where little. you would just cry and get so upset because someone touched your stuff, or someone went into your room, or someone was not sharing. and 25 years later, you still cry on your birthday about petty shit"
ya. so what. so what that my birthday just so happens to be the most depressing time of the year, as well as the happiest. but truth be told, i just want everyone to be nice to me and shower me with compliments and gold and kitties and the world. is that so much to ask for, the world?